Having the right mind set is critical to the success of anything more that the most basic session, such as masturbation. Even with that a good mind set makes it much better.
An important piece of the mind set is that all parties consider the activities to be consensual. It is essential for each party to give permission for the activities.
The mind should NOT have:
- distractions from work or other activities
- an overly developed agenda for the session
- lack of alertness
- being overly mentally tired
The mind SHOULD have:
- an active interest in the other participant(s)
- an open attitude/agenda for the session
- alertness with the ability to focus
- Being mindful and present in the moment
Of these elements, perhaps the most important and most difficult one to achieve is being mindful. Being Mindful is important to many aspects of life, not just sex. You can achieve a state of mindfulness after as little of 10 minutes of Meditation. There are studies that show that regular quiescent meditation sessions can actually allow the brain to heal itself. If you would like to try this meditation, the following video provides a 10 minute guided meditation.