Phase 5. Foreplay

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Once you have both asked and received permission to make love it is time to really start paying very close attention to each other. Start with your breathing, look deep into each other’s eyes and match your breathing rhythms while telling each other with your eyes that you want to connect energetically and physically. Then start to explore each other’s bodies on a much more intimate level than the techniques in phase 4, this time the focus is on cherishing with lust and playfulness.

Tantra is not about goals. It is not the destination that should concern you but how you get there. Each loving act should be complete in and of itself. As you get better at managing your sexual energy you will discover that orgasm can be achieved by a simple touch or looking into each other’s eyes! Start with the hands or feet and slowly work you way towards the genitals ensuring that you take enough time with each of the “G” zones on the way. You can include in this exploration licking, nibbling, stimulating conversation, and/or emotional connection. Kissing is an important part of this process, it is difficult to get into a real loving state without intense kissing – it tells the hormones what to start doing.

The more time you take in this step, the more enjoyable the following steps will be for both of you. When you finally get to the genitals, ensure that the entire area is well stimulated and lubricated before intercourse is attempted.

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